Criticism is a hard nut to swallow, and I tend to keep stray thoughts off of the blog and on my Twitter feed, where earlier today I said:

.@Joystiq are teetering on the edge of Kotakuitis. Their news stories are becoming lazier and lazier, each more badly-written than the last.

I mentioned this because I’ve been looking at their news posts for the last few days and… eugh, it’s not pretty. The website appears to have become a breeding ground for terrible jokes and a writing level only marginally better than Kotaku’s. They’re staying on-topic - for now, anyway - keeping their news firmly in gaming territory, but… well, I’ll let some of the writing speak for itself:

So, which is more bizarre? The fact that fans of dudefights living in Denmark won’t be able to get their EA Sports MMA fix due to energy drink pants? Or the fact that EA Sports refuses to change the energy drink pants into Taco Bell pants because it would ruin the authenticity of the MMA experience? We’re leaning towards the latter.

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Funcom has offered up the biggest peek yet into The Secret World with the latest trailer. Check it out for lots of gameplay footage, behind-the-scenes commentary and a look at the Templar faction’s starting hub, London. As a bonus, you’ll also learn how swallowing flies can give you magical powers.

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Regardless of whether or not you’re looking forward to Final Fantasy XIV, you really owe it to yourself to watch the new trailer posted after the jump. Not because it reveals the game’s theme song (“Answers,” as performed by pretty-voiced vocalist Susan Calloway), and not because it contains a few relatively rad cutscenes from the game, but because it features some of the most mind-blowingly insane writing to ever come out of the franchise. And that’s saying something.

“These tears,” the trailer posits. “Mankind’s fated burden? A gods-decreed sacrifice?” Whoa, there, trailer! “Radiant glory? Or heinous oblivion?” We don’t know how to answer that, trailer. The second one, we guess? We’re not entirely sure what you’re asking.

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Or how about this article, where they decided to not only steal an image from PC Gamer, but steal an image so brain-achingly retarded in execution? How how about these past examples of cerebral bankruptcy? What about THAT review of StarCraft II?

The writing level at Joystiq seems to have severely dipped over the last few months, but apparently some of the people at Joystiq don’t like you pointing that out. After tweeting about their poor quality of late the esteemed LudwigK of the Joystiq Podcast decided to weigh in on the matter in a courteous, professional manner:

@GameJournos You think people who give their whole day to the site don’t give a shit? We devote more consideration to our posts than you do.

Two things. Firstly, “we devote more consideration to our posts than you do”? How in the fuck can you possibly know whether that string of words is in any way accurate? “Consideration” is relative, an internal process of thought that cannot be measured in any real quantifiable process. Unless you have video footage of me Hmmm-ing and Haaaaah-ing whilst stroking my chin, supplimented with slightly longer of your writers doing exactly the same thing, try not to make such ridiculous, idiotic, nonsense claims.

The point is moot, of course, because at the moment I’m not putting a lot of consideration into posting on this blog. I’m looking for a job. You guys could be thinking no more than “Hey, I write for Joystiq!” and already you’re thinking more about the site you write for than I think about mine! Congratulations.

Secondly, whether or not your guys “give a shit” or not isn’t really up for debate considering the attitude some of the people at joystiq have taken to controversies like the aforementioned StarCraft II review, where the official company stance seems to be “don’t apologize and never mention it again”. Joystiq doesn’t fuck up often - it’s one of the strengths of the website, and one of the reasons I was recommending it to people no less than five months ago - but when they do fuck up and people call them out on it, like Joystiq’s readers did very loudly in the comments for the review, the company line that seems to be towed is that no, nobody does in fact give a shit.

Couple that with the exceptionally low quality of the writing on the site as of late and it becomes really difficult to feel that anybody at Joystiq gives any four-letter word about the content that goes up on the website.

While we’re here, let’s throw in the comments made by Dustin Deckard, who’s going to have a hard time convincing me that he wasn’t part of the line-up for failed British music act North and South:

@GameJournos And I think that, now that the storm you caused has subsided, you are grasping for more and more attention.

I’ve hardly blogged or tweeted at all this week, what with the jobhunt an’ all, and this guy thinks I’m “grasping for more and more attention”? Blimey.