Apparently there’s been some confusion about my post earlier this week concerning Kotaku’s inclusion of a spoiler alert in a republished article about Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception. A couple of people - incomprehensibly bizarre individuals with the reading skills of a recently concussed mollusk - read this post from earlier in the week and came to the rather bizarre conclusion that I was, haha, complaining that Kotaku had included a spoiler alert.

I thought my comment in the post made it rather clear that I wasn’t mocking their use of a spoiler alert but rather mocking their inconsistency with regards to posting spoilers - they’ll give readers a Head’s Up on content containing spoilers for games that have been out for a month, but if the game isn’t out yet then their readers can go fuck themselves.

My comment in the original post was fairly simple and rather neatly summed up my feelings on the matter, but as some people apparently aren’t able to parse short simple sentences and require longer, much more detailed commentary, I shall provide it.

Kotaku deigned to include a spoiler alert in their Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception post for two reasons: Firstly, and arguably most importantly, it’s actually a Pop Matters post written by Scott Juster, republished with permission by Kotaku (writing this kind of thought-provoking content isn’t really Kotaku’s forté).

Secondly, as the game had already been out for three weeks at the time of posting, there was no need for them to post a spoiler warning. Y’see, Kotaku makes its money from ad revenue, which is generated by pageviews. Kotaku has three ways of getting eyeballs on its site: Being the first to break news, producing (or republishing) thought-provoking or eyecatching content, or stirring up controversy.

The latter is something they’re quite good at, and they will even commend their writers for stirring up controversy that brings in pageviews. Ultimately they don’t care how they do it, so long as people are looking at their website and, in turn, the ads they run.

I called attention to the spoiler in the Drake’s Deception post because had the post been original Kotaku content, and had a post containing spoilers for the game been published before the game’s release, there wouldn’t have been a spoiler alert. We’d have been looking at a repeat of the Arkham City spoiler kerfuffle.

I wasn’t mocking Scott Juster. If Scott feels I was doing so then I offer my apologies, although we’ve spoken briefly on Twitter and he doesn’t seem like he’s terribly offended.

If anyone misinterpreted my post as deriding a man for including a spoiler alert then, well, maybe there’s a reason for that. Perhaps you’re new here, in which case it can’t be helped. Perhaps you genuinely are a recently-concussed mollusk, in which case I’m astounded you’re able to read let alone put together a coherent argument.

But if you’re not a new reader and you’re not a lophotrochozoa with a headwound, I find myself having to ask: What do you think this blog is for? Because if you think it’s for shitting on people who are doing a good job, as Scott undoubtedly was, then perhaps you’ve misinterpreted not just my post but the purpose of the entire site.